Money makes me uncomfortable. If I have it, I feel guilty. So for years, I have not be having it. And now I just wish our world was more like on Star Trek, where money doesn't even exist. So much in our world is powered by money....even saving the world.
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Fact is something that is quite indisputable. Fact is something you read in a dictionary or encylopedia. Truth is something that is always disputed between people and their societies. Truth comes from within an individual and is very personal. Facts are, in many ways, less harmful than truths. In the past, people who are passionate about their own truths and encountar another have killed for it.
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unfortunately, it's coffee. out of all things i consider important each day, coffee is the only thing that i always have. when my alarm goes off, i get up and start my coffee...then i lie back down until it is ready. this "ritual" has been important to me ever since i was homeless about 3 years ago. (by the way, mornings are the best time to give change to those asking for it. coffee is such a blessing after sleeping on concrete.)
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spontaneity is something i look for in my traveling companions. i tend to have more spontaneity while traveling than planning abilities. i hate to cut a good time short just to move on to the next item on the list. what makes me a good traveler would have to be my adaptability. i was once "forced" to eat watermelon seeds in south turkey, even though i still have a childhood fear that a watermelon may grow out my rear at any moment. hey,,,when in rome....
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I look at the world around me in order to stay open. I love the quote from the book "Fight Club", "Look up at the stars and your gone. Look up at the stars and youre nothing". When I see the moon, sometimes I feel so insignificant in the most lovely way. We are all here, but those stars were here way before us! On the other side of that....If I wake up in the morning and feel special, I can barely make it through the day.
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I am lucky to have a variety of people and oppurtunities in my life. I actually work at the Welcome Center at my Community College where I have wonderful conversations with my elders as well as the young ones who call me an elder. Both of these groups teach me patience and resilience. Once I am home, I almost always take an hour or so to visit with my neighbors on this crazy block in West Oakland. What a variety we are!>?! Here, I get a chance to communicate with people who have had a great day and people who have had a horrible day. All of this versatility is teaching me to be more consistent in my feelings and answers. Without my own congruency in this world, I would be lost.
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In all reality, I don't like being alone most of the time. I love being in a room with many people chatting away. However, being in school has forced me to keep to myself more,,,to look deep inside of myself. And I must say, I am learning a lot and I like the changes that are taking place because of this solitude.
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As a former massage therapist, I completely understand and welcome the healing power of touch. Just a hand on my shoulder has pulled me out of some hefty spots. In the past, the times I didn't want to be touched were very hard times. In those times, I felt like I would never belong anywhere, and must have not wanted to think I would.
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